Chalk this up as one of the most irresponsible things I’ve done up till now. I was going to call it the whackiest or the craziest, but, well, Irresponsible seems to fit better. ‘Sides, I’ve gotten reamed for it already.
Not this past Tuesday, but Tuesday from last week, we (Roommate, Excitable Cousin, and me) were visiting some relations who live in a pretty quiet residential area…on a hill. A hill with a 45% grade. And it’s nighttime.
Roommate’s Boyfriend is there, and Roommate & Boyfriend are too busy paying attention to each other, so Excitable Cousin and I hop into Roommate’s car and decide to go for a ride, with Roommate’s permission. (I will therefore say this: it’s only partly my fault that this occurred in the first place - I mean, if the Roommate had said no, I couldn’t drive the car, none of this would’ve happened.) Excitable Cousin is the first one to get behind the wheel.
Bad. Idea.
Excitable Cousin has driven her dad’s truck before, but one needs less pressure on the brake to stop the truck, and more pressure on the gas pedal to make the truck go. Not so with Roommate’s car. In fact, it’s completely the opposite.
So Excitable Cousin is giggling as she steps on the gas pedal, hard, and we zoom out of the neighborhood at 45 mph. I’m clutching the passenger chair as she stops because she needs to make a U-turn. Well, a U-turn isn’t possible, so now we try a 3-point turn. No, this isn’t working. I’m starting to sound like my mother as I tell her to stop, you’re going to hit the frickin’ car behind us, turn the wheel left harder so she won’t hit the parked car in front of us, okay, there you go, now press on the gas gently, gently!, okay, now you can go… Oh, and are your lights on? Good. ‘Kay, go slowly, ease up on the gas, oh, there’s the Roommate & Boyfriend getting their entertainment for the night as they watch me have several near heart attacks and the Excitable I-Had-Too-Much-Caffeine Cousin hits the curb as she tries to parallel park the car again.
Ugh.
I get behind the wheel, as the Roommate suggests I take the Excitable Cousin to the nearby community college that’s just down the street so my I-Had-Too-Much-Caffeine relation can have a larger area to practice in.
Sure thing. It turns out that driving down a 45% grade hill is funner than I thought it’d be.
Excitable Cousin gets behind the wheel again. All right, going 50 mph in the parking lot - uh, not a bad thing, right? Sure, cuz, you can go up that little drop-off area– Hey, waitaminnit, you’d better not go up the street, you might try to hit another car over there [parking lot is full there]. Um, there’s a bus coming behind us, you want to move so we’re not in the way? Watch out, ease up on the gas pedal! *CRUNCH* Okay, that didn’t sound good…
I get out of the car because the Excitable Cousin got a little too out of the way and hit another curb. No (visible) damage… Hey, cuz, why don’t you let me drive back, eh?
I suppose this is one of those You Needed to Be There incidents, but really - we didn’t get caught by a cop and arrested for driving without a license. We didn’t swipe any cars. I certainly didn’t hit anything.
The moral of the story? Don’t have a driving lesson with an easily Excitable seventeen-year-old.
Especially if you don’t have a license yourself.
And especially if escapades like this one gives her one heck of an adrenaline rush.
